A story about a boy.

This is a story about a boy named Tanner and a girl named Natty.  Two kids, both born with some challenges that would keep many people down, but not these two.  They faced obstacles but overcame them.  They were fortunate to grow up with famiies that were protective enough to keep them from some of the tougher realities of the world, but supportive enough to teach them how to become independent.

One day, they meet at the adult learning center where they both spend their days, and as they say, "that's all she wrote."

Over the next 3 years they spend lots of time together, getting to know each, meeting each other's families and learning what being part of a couple is all about.  They competed together in Special Olympics, begin spending holidays with each other, and even begin tossing around the idea of getting married some day.

Then one day Natty is diagnosed with cancer.

And for the next 2 years, she spends her days getting chemo treatments instead of going to work...has to stay home to avoid being exposed to germs instead of going to the movies.  So they begin to text daily to keep in touch, and wait for the results of Natty's white count to give them permission to see each other. 

And she earns the name Might Warrior Woman from me because she faced the ravages of her treatment with no complaints and so much courage that I respect her even more.

And their committment to each other stays strong.  And they still talk about having a future together.



Then one day, Natty loses her battle with cancer.

And we are all devastated by the loss of this very special young woman.  But no more devastated than Tanner.

While we are relieved that Natty's pain is gone and that she is now healed, we struggle to understand the reason for her having to leave us.

 We struggle to understand God's purpose. 

And we struggle to not be bitter by the unfairness of life.

We love you and miss you, Natty Clayton. 

Family Pics

Friday night our older boys came home in response to their summons to gather for a family picture.  Our last such gathering happened over 6 years ago, so I thought it was a good idea to update the 11x13 hanging over the TV.

 Not only are our then-preschool daughters now pre-teens, but now we have a new member :-)

Before the "real" photographer showed up, I took a few pics just to check out the background I had selected.

 

 

 

I'm anxious to see how they turned out, and will post my favorites. I LOVE THESE FACES and can't wait to get them up on my wall!

  Thank you to my kids for their patience and willingness to do whatever our photographer asked them to do. It was cold and blustery that evening, so if we look chilled, it's because we were!

Passages...

I know I'm terribly behind, considering all that has happened here the past few weeks. We have welcomed new family members, and we have had to say goodbye to some as well. 

We have gone from a family of 6 to one of 8.  I didn't think adding 2 kids to our household would take up so much of my time and energy, but I think it's because we have gone from a somewhat normal routine to "Slumber Party Chaos" and it's leaving me and my house looking a bit frazzled.

We are very happy to welcome GW and his sister, J, to our family, and they fit in with this group really well.  However, transitions are never flawless, and trying to learn family rules and routines is hard enough, but to move to another house, get used to new people, and also deal with the grief of having your family and home dissolved can't be anything less than heartbreaking.  So for now, we will do our best to make them feel welcome and loved, and worry about the mess and rule breaking later on.

Camille, J, GW, and Quinn
(and yes, that is my Diet Coke)

We had to say goodbye to my Dad this month- after 2 years of battling cancer, along with various other health issues, he is finally at peace.  He got his wish of not having to live in a nursing home, and only spent a few days in hospice at the end.  Stubborn man! 

His funeral was a lovely gathering of family and old friends, sharing stories and memories, sometimes laughing, sometimes crying.

 Best Friends from Anoka- the Westrums and Molendas

Rod Garrison telling golf stories

As usual- my attempts at a family photo never pan out- Tanner is missing!

Then as we were working through our feelings of loss over Grandpa Rod, we lost another special member of our family....Emma.

 

 

You were always a bundle of furry sweetness, and you loved Bri with all your heart.  We will miss your exuberance for life, your ability to do the splits on the kitchen floor, and your fun filled spirit.  You will always be in our hearts.

  

March Updates~

If I tend to ramble during this quick update, blame it on the Dayquil-induced fog that I've been in since I was hit with the flu last Wednesday.  Since it's been quite awhile since I posted, because of our Lent inspired internet break, I'll just hit the highlights.

* Survived our Daniel Fast and we all learned alot about reading labels and carefully choosing our food. I think I even lost a pound or two. We ended it by celebrating with a Girl Scout Cookie binge-fest!  (I know- we're bad!)

*  We attended the South Dakota Special Olympics Basketball tournament in Yankton to watch Tanner play basketball.  He did a wonderful job, and as usual, watching these enthuisiastic athletes play was nothing less than inspiring!  I was very proud to watch Tanner feed the ball more than once to a player on the other team with Down Syndrome so that boy could make a basket.  Tanner is as compassionate as he is chatty! Afterwards, they were picked up in a stretch limo to attend a dance held for the athletes that night.

Armed with a Mountain Dew, ready for the night!

* Spent a week without internet or TV as our Lent "offering" and I was really proud of the girls!  They hardy complained at all, and we found so many other things to keep ourselves busy that we didn't miss the TV much.  What I DID miss was the sit down time- I ended up keeping busy many nights until 9:00, then I would wonder why I was so pooped!  Even if I'm not watching TV with the kids, if it's on at night, at least I sit down and do something, so I did miss my down time.
We were also painfully reminded of how much I rely on the computer anymore, from checking my bank balance to looking up a recipe- it has become the quickest information source, and it was missed for that purpose during the week.

* Foster care update- we will continue to have Little Man stay with us, as social workers begin working on reviewing homestudies submitted from relatives.  We would gladly keep him on a permanent basis, but we will do our best to be patient as his caseworker does her best to find him a forever home.  He is a very special little guy, with alot of wonderful qualities and a joy that hasn't yet been stifled by neglect or abuse, so we pray that he will be placed in a home that will encourage him to continue being the happy little guy that he is.  (And if that would happen to be here with us, we will consider it a blessing :-)

* Homeschool has been less "inspired" this spring and more "task" orented, with us plowing through the required readings and assignments with our eyes on the end, instead of meandering through this rich curriculum as we have done with others at a more enjoyable pace.  I think back fondly of the Greek meal and dress-up night we had, our Statue of Liberty costumes, Native American crafts made from nature, and have to hope that we will have time to fit in some fun activities yet this year before summer consumes us and our time.  We are currently studying India, and I'm hoping I can figure out how I can either locate some true Indian food, or how I can magically whip it up in my kitchen.

* 4H- our recent community service project was to go the Nursing Home and play Bingo with the residents.  They LOVED having the kid play with them, and the energy level was infectious!  We hope this will encourage our 4H kids to always think of ways to make other people's lives better.

*  Church update- we had a Family Fun Night with kids at our church.  We served pizza and had families bring their favorite games to play.  It ran from 6-8:30 and everyone seemed to have a great time.  I think this is one activity that we will want to do again.

*  House update- we've been working hard on the basement, trying to tape and texture it ourselves, with Loren and Bri doing most of the work so far.  The more walls that we do, the bigger the basement seems to be!  We are hoping to get done with it by this weekend so we can begin painting the rooms and maybe putting on trim and doors.  Handy men we are NOT, so we'll see how this goes :-)

With all this early spring weather, and the incredibly long list of projects that need to be done, I'm sure I will have less and less time to post family doings for awhile. 

But we can always post pictures of cuteness!!







Timelines

Timeline tracking seems to be the focus of our days lately...we are on day 19 of our wait on Travel Approval, day 30 of our time spent here living with my folks, month 15 of our adoption journey... You get the picture.  It seems like we are obsessed with deadlines and milestones, trying to get our house move/renovation completed before we leave for China, trying to get our little girl adopted before the end of the year, trying to meet paperwork deadlines for the bank.

I know we are to take time to enjoy the journey, but these days, I feel as if I'm too busy sprinting towards an invisible finish line to notice much of anything else.

I have to say that spending this time at my folks has been a blessing.  Even though we only live 12 miles away (although, now we are going to be much closer!) it isn't often that we spend this much time just hanging out and doing normal things like making dinner together or folding clothes.  My Mom seems to be enjoying the company, but then again, maybe she's just too polite to look irritated!  My Dad, on the other hand, just looks around, shakes his head, and I'm sure is wondering how to get all these extra people out of his house :-)  To say that we are messing with the routine of his life is an understatement!

I have to think that in a few months, we will look back on this time of being held hostage by our deadlines and approval notices, and remember the fun we had being at Grandma's House.  

Bri and Tanner playing cards.

Bri and Camille working on their Great Wall and Chinese Horoscope on Grandma's kitchen table.

She said~ He said

Camille loves to come out and help me in the garden- not so much for the gardening, but for the uninterrupted opportunity to talk to me.  About everything and anything.  Because she knows the other kids avoid weeding and harvesting, so she doesn't have to share mom.

This week, she informed me that when she gets to be a grown up, she wants to become a house builder, a babysitter, and a person that works at Dad's work.  Umm...okay- sounds good. 

Then she informed me that she was also going to quit her jobs when she was 30 and she planned on adopting "lots of kids from Ethiopia and China, and maybe England."    (England?  Too cute.  And the way she tries to say "Ethiopia" just about makes me giggle every time.)  "And Mom, wouldn't that be cool that they will be speaking different languages?"  She has really been putting alot of thought into her adoption plan.

 Adoption has really been on her mind alot lately, because it colors many of her recent conversations.

She asked me one night in the car if I will be sad when Quinn has to go back to China, and that led to an interesting visit.   She was under the impression that we had actually adopted Menha and Deng, our last 2 foster care placements, so when they were returned to their family, Camille assumed that Quinn will also be someday be returned to her family in China. 

Obviously this has bothered her alot, but after explaining the difference and assuring her that both she and Quinn are adopted and not fostered, and that they will always belong to this family, she visibly relaxed. I think the fear of attaching and losing another "sister" was really bothering her- she's been much happier since.

Glad we got THAT ironed out!  :-)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Picked up Tanner last Thursday from Yankton so he could be home for Danish Days, and as always, his sense of humor had me smiling in no time.

He was telling me about how he went to the Yankton Pool that day to see the Viborg kids who were there for lessons, and how excited they were to see him. 

Tanner: "And the crowds went wild, Mom, the crowds went wild." 

Me:  "Really? The kids were happy to see you?"

Tanner:"Well duh.  I'm the most popular guy in Yankton. "

Son, you make me laugh!

Special Olympics

Yesterday and today we spent the afternoons watching the South Dakota State Special Olympics Basketball tournament.  More than 500 athletes were competing from all around the state.  If you ever get a chance to attend a Special Olympics event,  you won't regret it.  The athletes are so happy about playing, so proud of their abilities, and for the most part, they are playing for the right reasons- to have fun!  We saw some athletes being given the chance to shoot over and over again, by both teams, so they cold have the thrill of making a basket.  We saw more volunteers show up than were needed, coaches volunteering alot of time to train these athletes, and families following their athletes from game to game, cheering them on.

Tanner taking the tip off.



Luke, Tanner, Grandma Lee, Michelle (me)

Special Olympics gives these kids and adults a chance to experience the excitement of participating in sports and the comraderie of being part of a team.  I can't say enough good things about this organization.

We are very proud of OUR athlete- wonderful job today, Tanner.